Friday, January 9, 2015

New Year, New Goals and New Beginnings


          I just returned from my first official “vacation” as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Durban, South Africa.  It was an enjoyable trip with lots of good food, a decent beer (still no IPA or Black Butte Porter), beautiful beach and great friends.  Coming back to my community after spending New Years looking out across the Indian Ocean has given me lots of time to reflect on lessons learned and lived.  Everyone has his or her New Years resolutions, loose weight, eat healthier, and read the Bible every day.  I never have had a New Years resolution, I believe that every day I get up is a New Year, a new day and new minute to live your life better than before.  The last 6 months as a Peace Corps Volunteer have taught me more than I could learn in lifetime about myself and there is still much more to learn.
         To begin with, how can you build a library without a foundation, start a club without a common interest, or change a behavior with no motivation.  It all starts little by little (ncane kancane).  When you look at a New Years resolution, everyday, 365 days, 12 months, it can seem a little daunting and overwhelming.  How long do they really last?  I am sure there are lots of people though who have succeeded and made great changes in their life from New Years resolutions, I am not one of them.  Change takes time.  It is reversing something that has been engrained and taught to us from a young age, or something that has just formed out of habit.  With every change, whether it is behavioral or physical, there are obstacles.  We all have them, some larger than others.  Trust me, they do get in the way.  When working towards change, there are failures.  Some may be able to go an entire month without a failure, 6 months even, while others it may be only a day, or an hour.  We cannot get discouraged from those failures though and with every failure there is a strength that comes out of it.  Here in Swaziland I have been going through changes personally as well as working on changes in my community and school.  I have already come across many obstacles, personal failures, and moments of doubt in myself if I can actually make a difference here.  On a personal level, we all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, but God has given us a gift of grace and forgiveness when he sent His son to die on the cross for us.  The ultimate gift and sacrifice.  This alone helps me on a personal level to get back up, ask for forgiveness and pursue His path even stronger than before.  I also know that God goes before me in whatever I do, before I start a project, have a meeting, or speak with someone on the side of the road.  He prepares hearts and minds to receive his word and each one of us to make a difference.  That is my New Years resolution, let God be my strength, prepare my path and wake up each day giving it to Him, no matter what may happen.
         The Peace Corps changes you and I don’t think anyone will ever understand how it does until you have experienced it yourself.  Yet still, each volunteer has a unique experience that cannot be generalized into a cookie cutter answer to others.  There is no common theme, belief or outcome of serving for 27 months in a developing country.  I remember before setting out on my own adventure and asking current and returned volunteers what to expect, I never really got a straight answer.  Being an American it was frustrating.  It’s either 1 or 2, right?  I understand it now and I won’t be able to explain it when I return back to the States what I did, learned and how I changed.  I guess it’s all up for interpretation.  One volunteer said the Peace Corps is like a two-year black hole in our lives.  We leave behind friends, family, jobs, and our comfort to experience something that is unique to each one of us.  After two-years, we return home, see our family, start relationships and careers, yet there will always be those two-years in Swaziland that are unexplainable.  Granted, I have only been here for a little over 6 months, but this is how I feel currently.  Who knows, it can change tomorrow though, it’s the blissful ride of Peace Corps Swaziland.
         On a lighter note, here are some of the more recent happenings in Swaziland and what I have learned.  Currently, everything that is plugged into my wall socket and is metal shocks me when I touch it; I have to use a stick to turn on and off my light switch to avoid being shocked.  Not sure why that started happening all of the sudden but it does, it is like shock therapy, don’t touch the metal surfaces.  The bats are still living in my roof/wall and every so often they decide to take a little flight inside my hut at night.  The ongoing battle continues.  I can easily watch an entire season of any show in a day, enjoy doing laundry by hand now and will pick though an entire 5kg bag of sugar beans taking out the rotten ones.  There is also the constant killing of flies and seeing how long you can sit still before you start to sweat profusely in the 100 degree temperatures that is Africa.  I might buy a kiddies pool for my hut (it was done in the dorms with Phi Delt), bringing it to Africa.  School will be starting soon, thankfully, and I am looking forward to being back in the school and to start some of the projects we have in mind.  Until next time, Swazi time.

Mantenga Falls in Swaziland